Anxiety. We all feel it to some extent. I’ve got some things coming up soon that are causing me great stress and it got me thinking.
I talked not long ago about how I’m a worry bird. I worry about nearly everything and I also have anxiety issues. Related, but different in some ways. It’s been a part of my whole life.
It does limit me sometimes. It prevents me from driving to some places because I have a terrible anxiety about driving. It doesn’t stop me completely though. I’ve driven in quite a lot of situations that I was super nervous about. There is some driving that just pushes me to my limit and I’m actually worried that I will make a mistake and cause an accident. I’m lucky that my family is very understanding about it. And, truth be told, I know I would if I really had to. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and do it.
I can’t allow anxiety to take over my life. But I could see it happening if I let it.
I’ve missed out on so much because of it, but I’ve experienced so much in spite of it.
I have forced myself to get out there and do things because of love. Love of my family, business, and interests that I’m passionate about. I volunteered in so many things my two kids were involved in. I chaperoned countless field trips. I chaired fundraisers. I was a Girl Scout leader and a Cub Scout Den Leader. I was very involved in my son’s Boy Scout troop in many ways. I’ve served on different boards. I’ve even had to speak in front of groups.
And here’s a little secret. Don’t tell anyone. 🙂 I have felt some level of anxiety with each thing in which I’ve been involved. But I refuse to let it stop me. For the most part, I’ve learned to accept it as part of my life. I know it will be there – butterflies, that dread feeling in the pit of my stomach, headaches, the shaky weak-in-the-knees feeling – and I just have to work through it.
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not trivializing someone who has extreme anxiety. By all means, I think that someone with crippling anxiety issues should seek some help. I would if I needed it. I’m simply pointing out that the issues are there for me and I’ve managed to live with them.
Sometimes I think it would be easier to just step back and do my job, clean my house, read, and pursue some hobbies. Yes it would be easier, but I would miss out on so much and, as my husband would say, my brain might turn to mush.
So, I venture out of my comfort zone and brave my way through the storm of anxiety.